Leftover Cuties – TOUR TIPS

This set of Tour Tips were written by the drummer of the alternative band, Leftover Cuties, Stuart Johnson. You can check out Stuart’s tips for being on tour, after the break.

1. TRY NOT TO TAKE UP TOO MUCH SPACE.
This not only applies to clothing and gear, but just general courtesy to the limited shared space that is the van, tour bus, or even plane that you are traveling on. I have done all three and even the most comfortable of environments can become prison-like if you spread out too much. Just be cool. This also applies to blasting music, taking off your sweaty sneakers, passing gas, and arguing beyond reason. There is a time and a place for all of those, and its usually NEVER the shared travel space. Going on the road is like going into battle. You need to be respectful, have each others backs, and show some common courtesy. It keeps bands together. Trust me.

2. DONT LAG…
I’m embarrassed to say but I’m usually the one to lag behind, I live in a different dimension. Yes, I run on “Johnson” time most of the time, but fact is, tour schedules are often tight. Almost impossibly so. Tour days are packed with massive hurdles (long drives, interviews, radio visits, photo shoots, meet and greets, load in and the gig itself) and that requires everyone to be hitting their mark when they are supposed to. For that reason i do my best to be what I call “a better version of me” on the road. More like the one I wish I was all the time I guess. Funny though, most every touring musician I know has been “oil-spotted ” at one time or another. That’s when you come out of the hotel, or gas station restroom, or wherever LATE and there is an oil spot on the ground where the tour bus used to be. (tip: always keep your cell phone on you) You don’t have to be the first back in your seat every time, (nobody like a nerd) but try not to be the last one every time either. We all lag sometimes, and good bands find ways to keep it light, stick together and keep it moving.

3. Shit HAPPENS !!!
No matter how much you plan and double check and prepare, things can go wrong. Don’t be a hot head. Try to roll with it. Make a challenge of changing a tire in the rain, or getting stuck in a funeral procession on the way to a gig you are already running close on time to get to. These are the exact same stories you will tell around the dinner table and laugh about when you get a few years further down the road. Believe me. TRY YOUR BEST NOT TO STRESS…Tell a joke if you can, or just bond with the band in some way, to ease the tension, to make it the best you can. Once again, if you stick together, no matter what, by the time you do make it to the gig and set up to play, the band will be solid with each other and that goes a long way with audiences. They know when musicians are tense and at each others throats. Every band has shit that falls apart or doesn’t go as planned. Just don’t let it rob you of the real reason you are out there traveling and making music with your friends. Musicians: Be good to each other and the audiences will be good to you.

4. EAT WELL, SLEEP WHENEVER AND WHERE EVER YOU CAN And EXCeRcISE , EXCeRcISze, EXERCISE !!
I’m a drummer and get a workout carrying my gear, setting up and tearing down and playing them. But sitting in the van for up to 8 hours will turn you into an old lady. (Sorry to all the old touring ladies who may be reading this. ) Fact: I hate to run when I’m at home. But I realized quickly a good pair of running shoes weighs practically nothing, takes up no space and affords me a first hand look at the town I have arrived in. Every morning I wake up on tour, I’m in a new place! Cool! I run 30 minutes in one direction, then 30 minutes back. (same path so I dont chance getting lost) I do this often before the band even wakes up, it’s my personal time which is essential for my sanity on the road. I’ve run thru small towns, down railroad tracks, thru graveyards, across cornfields, down dry riverbeds, covered bridges, all over the U.S. and Canada. We are lucky as musicians to go everywhere that we do. And it makes sense to step out of the van and hotel room as often as possible to see really see the country in this personal way, up close and quiet, early in the morning. Take an iPhone, take pictures. You will have energy thru out the day, play better that night, and have something cool to share with the audience. Local audiences love when you care enough to get out and see where they live.  Don’t kill yourself with touring, you can actually bring yourself back to life. I did.

4 1/2…MAKE LOCAL FRIENDS , DO LOCAL THINGS AND EAT LOCAL FOOD…
I like to talk to people that come to the shows and find out where their favorite local spots are to eat. If there is something that is notable and regional, try it. The weirder the better for me. You won’t find some of these things in the freezer section back in L.A. at Ralph’s that’s for damn sure. And if it’s summer and you have a mind to, ask them if there is a swimming hole or river or hot springs or creek to take a dip in. A few summers ago on tour  I swam about 1/2 a mile across a lake in Wisconsin and right up to a boat with two old men fishing in it.  They were facing the other direction, and when they turned around and saw me there bobbing in the water they shouted  “WHAT The  #%$K !! where the hell did you come from? ….” innocently I said .. “Los Angeles”.

5. MOST IMPORTANT OF ALL…..
If you can’t afford a professional driver and you are sharing the duty of captaining your tour ship follow these rules to a T.Do not tailgate. (save it for your Xbox)
Do not speed. (speeding tickets take time out of the driving schedule and money out of the tour budget)Do not blast everyone out with your music ( generally the driver gets to pick the tunes but if it isn’t jiving with the rest of the band, turn it down or just throw in one earbud)
Do not jerk the wheel, or goose the gas pedal, it makes the people in back carsick.
PLEASE DO REMEMBER……that when it’s your turn to drive, you have four or five of your very best friends lives in your hands. “Their lives are in your hands, Dude” …. And all their families are waiting patiently for them to come home safe. Try to be rested when your shift comes up. And definitely be sober. With a little planning, you can work it into the schedule where you will have plenty of time to drink a little bourbon or spark a fatty guilt-free, without putting your whole band at risk. People die all the time from dumb shit that they never ever saw coming. (james dean) Don’t willingly add to the risks we all take when we set out to do 50,000 miles in a tin can on wheels.

Of course all this can be summed up in two words, just…… BE COOL.”

If you see the van a-ROCKIN….”
( you know the rest)

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