Los Colognes – TOUR TIPS

In this Tour Tips segment, Jay Rutherford of the rock band, Los Colognes, gives you their tips for being on tour. You can check out the feature, after the break.

Hey, this is Jay from the band Los Colognes. We’re a rock band out of Nashville and have spent the last few years driving insanely illogical distances for the opportunity to play our music in front of people. Here are some tips we’ve learned along the way. From functional pragmatism to spiritual well-being, these 5 tips may or may not make your next tour just a little bit better.

1. PODCASTS:
If you’re going to be stuck in the damn van for 7 hours a day you might as well learn something. It may be a no duh to some folks who are already hip to the podcast world, but this was a game changer for us. There’ are legitimate mind-opening, conversation starting podcasts out there, stuff to make you and the bandmates pause and debate for an hour. Nothing is better than time going by quickly as you’re debating the fundamental nature of reality. Check out Sam Harris, Joe Rogan, Marc Maron, and Jordan Peterson. There’s a world of information out there, and in 2017 being able to have actual discourse is going to save us from political hell.

2. SALADS:
Go to Jason’s Deli. Or Whole Foods. Don’t just eat Doritos and Taco Bell and Chic-Fil-A every day for lunch. Intentionally put some fiber and greens into your delicate, beer and booze-riddled system. Hell, we all know how traveling messes up our normal body patterns. You’re drinking too much. You’re smoking too much. You’re getting awful sleep, drooling and snoring over your bass player. Everybody is gonna feel better with a salad every now and then. The van will smell better. You’ll feel better. You’ll play better. And best of all, you can eat that fat burger at the venue and get hammered knowing that you’ve already done your healthy due diligence for the day.

3. NAVIGATOR/YELPER/HOTEL FINDER:
Ideally, one person in the van has the “street smarts.” No, I’m not talking about the dude who finds the drugs after the show. I’m talking about the person who utilizes the myriad opportunity cell phone technology has to offer. When someone is driving, the person in shotgun is obligated to navigate (Google is way better than Apple). This person should also be an avid Yelp user. Someone who can find badass Mexican food in nowhere Indiana. Or someone who can find delectable ethnic food off of a random exit in Arkansas. Or someone who can navigate Priceline with precision, saving you that extra 50 bucks on hotels. Use technology in your favor.

4. HEADPHONES/WHITE NOISE:
Chances are you’re going to be severely lacking sleep. By this point, though, you’ll be smarter from your philosophy podcasts, healthier from your salad, and less broke because you saved money on a decent hotel. Somebody (or everybody) in the band probably snores. You may, in fact, be dehydrated. Or sleeping on the floor. Or sharing a queen bed with the smelly person. Whatever it is, we’ve found that insane amounts of white noise, either from hotel fans or from simulated white noise apps on our phones, helps drown out the existential nightmares of touring. Put on some headphones, crank the fan sounds, and you’ll be off to la la land in no time.

5. GEAR TETRIS:
Pay attention to the way you load your van. Do it the same every time. Don’t be an amateur. Get a system down. Switch off packing duties. Don’t run off flirting with people after the gig when everyone else is doing the heavy lifting. And if you happen to not be helping to load the van, it better be because you’re selling merch to help the band get down the road. One super helpful trick we’ve done with our passenger van is to take out the back bench and cut out a large square piece of heavy duty plywood which can stand up against the back side of the subsequent bench. The wood reaches to the ceiling, allowing us to stack keyboards and big amps and guitars all the way up to the top of the van. This allows us to not have to use a separate trailer. It also eliminates the fear of a guitar or keyboard sliding forward and crushing someone’s skull when the driver is not paying attention and slams on the breaks because he isn’t smart, didn’t eat a salad, doesn’t have a navigator, and didn’t sleep the night before because he had no white noise…

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