The King’s Parade – TOUR PRANKS

In this Tour Pranks segment, the alternative band, The King’s Parade, share some pranks that have happened on tour. You can check out the feature, after the break.

I feel like the prank we pulled on Sam (Keys) in Koln was one of the best ones in our pranking careers.

We had just finished our show in this cool little club and thought we may as well go and enjoy the rest of the night since we didn’t have a crazy early start the next morning. Koln is a beautiful city, but like most cities in Germany, it’s also home to beautiful beer which can sometimes pull the attention away from the architectural wonders available. Sam is one of those guys who likes to think he’s a beer connoisseur and, as a result of his ‘passion’, he’ll often end up falling asleep in unlikely places; thus making him easy prey on the road.

The first signs of him flagging were at the Kebab shop a few hours later. The morsels of meat flying everywhere and drunken words of wisdom about the quality of his late night feast were our queue; to be fair to him, Germany make one hell of a Kebab!

We decided to take the slightly comical route home and make the most of the city’s facilities by hopping onto the Tram. The tram stops in Koln are not very far apart, some might say oddly close but then I think that’s probably because I’m used to the Tube in London… And so is Sam; this is important.

As predicted, the minute Sam’s buttocks hit the comfy Tram seat he was gone. The tram rocked Sam’s Döner filled body like a parent rocks their child after dinner. The only key difference was that instead of a baby bottle, Sam was holding a half-empty bottle of Köln’s finest lager between his legs.

I know what you’re thinking, but no that’s too easy! We had to think fast because our stop was approaching and we wanted to do something memorable. All the pieces of the puzzle were in place and now it was up to us to seal the deal. In some moment of serendipity, Tom had remembered a Facebook video he’d seen in which a group of mates jumped off the tube and woke up their drunken victim just before the doors closed and left him therefore stranded. Great…but it wasn’t enough. We gently pulled the bottle from between his legs and put it right in front of his feet; that was to be the cherry on the sauerkraut.

Everything was in place and finally, it was our stop. We jumped off the tram and waited patiently outside the window watching him clueless on the tram. Finally, we heard the chime indicating that the doors were closing and slammed the windows to wake him up.

*Cue classical music*

Sam woke up. You could almost see every incremental turn of the cogs in his mind. It was beautiful. Like pushing the first domino, we watched him as he saw us standing outside with the biggest grins on our faces and, as predicted, he tried to get to the doors before they closed. Oh, Sam…poor clueless sam. In that moment he kicked the bottle that we had placed in front of his feet and his eyes went from worried to confused as he looked down at the mess he had made and back up again at the doors of the tram that was now already en route.

Like rubbing salt into a wound, we jogged alongside the tram cackling until it reached it’s next stop only 200m away…

Cheers, Sam. And may your love for lager linger forevermore.

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