Unwed Teenage Mothers – CRAZY TOUR STORIES

This crazy story from the road was written by the rock band, Unwed Teenage Mothers. You can check out the band’s story, after the break.

This is not a very wild tour story. In my experience touring is 90% van farts and dick jokes. Its very much a “you had to be there” kind of thing. Anyway, I booked a house show in Asheville, NC through a friend. The show was at this old run down farm house way out in the middle of nowhere. Most of the kids there were crust punks with greasy mohawks and massive chips on their shoulders. I’m all for kids being punks, but these dudes were moshing to “Rocky Raccoon” singalong-style on acoustic guitars. These kids were all wearing their standard-issue black clothes with the logos of bands they’ve never heard. I feel like I’m talking shit, we had friends there, and there were some really great punk and metal bands that played and overall the night was really fun, but I’ve gotta play it up to sell it as a ‘wild tour story’, yeah? Anyway, as the night went on we started to realize that our brand of powerpop rock ‘n roll kind of music was not going to go over well with these kids. So what do you do when you’re in a no-win situation in unfamiliar territory? We said fuck it and played the show in character as WWE heels. Johnny and I antagonized the crowd the entire show and they booed back at us the whole time. We taunted them, we mocked them, and they really seemed to hate us. We pushed them as far as we could, unplugged our guitars, said our goodbyes, and drove to a cheap hotel outside of the city. Looking back, the show was really fun, and we had fun with a crowd that didn’t understand us anyway. Cheers to Asheville, NC and all the crust punks that squat in old farmhouses.

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